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Coming out of the broom closet
Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2003 5:47 pm
Now, I think that we might have had this question here at one time, but I was wondering if any of you are out of the broom closet yet?
Anyway, the reason for asking is, you all know that my best friend knows that I'm wicca. But Sunday when I was working, we got on the subject of hidden things and how halloween is coming up. It was just two of us, and the girl I was talking to asked if I was a witch when I said she might be surprised what is hidden in my life. I just gave her a look like ya never know and she asked if I was wicca. She told me that one of the other workers is and I said yeah. It turns out that the other girl isn't wicca, but she checked into it a lot when she decided that christianity wasn't for her.
Then, last night my boss was talking about having had a bad car accident and her son giving her hematite to help her heal better. I started talking about the different qualities of different stones, and stuff. Then I told that I'm wicca and she said that her daughter was into it a while ago.
So, I'm out of the broom closet kinda. I haven't told many people. And my littlest sister is on the list, but thats it.
I wanted to know, also, what some of your stories are about coming out, if you have any.
Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2003 6:57 pm
It's funny that you should ask this question today, for today is the first time I have ever shared with anyone my new beliefs.
I have fought the deep leading to tell my 31 year old daughter what I have been doing. I did not want to appear to be 'converting' anyone in any way! But today she came to my house and broke down in tears, she started telling me how the spiritual part of her life was totally unfulfilled and how miserable it was making her to be so empty.
This was a very brave thing for her to do as my spiritual walk, the last she had checked, was of a born-again on fire Christian that the mention of tarot cards of horoscope sent into shrieks about the devil and his demons. She was very explicit that although she wanted the spiritual part of her fulfilled, she could not accept my christianity.
You can imagine her surprise when I told her where my path had led me! And you can imagine my delight when she couldn't get enough of what I was telling her. It was like a bond that had been made before we were born suddently came alive!
Needless to say we are more than excited about sharing this wonderful path together. We cannot thank the god/goddess enough for this gift.
Still, she is the only one that I feel I will ever share this with for some time to come.
Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2003 6:59 pm
I have been out for years, but it was not easy for a lot of people to accept it. I still get a fair amount of *christian* bull about being a satanist or a deluded lost soul, but that is just a closed minded reaction.
It was difficult for my mother as both her side and my father's side had quite a bit of practices a few generations back, and even some *folk* practices through the current day. She got real spooked back in the late 70's and early 80's when I was a kid and we would *play* ESP games or I would see spirits or pick up on emotions. She was totally freaked and avoided anything she considered *new age* or *occult*, although for the most part, she wouldn't know occult or magick if it bit her on the nose.
We broke appart when I was 16 and we civil to eachother, but that was about it for years. Then when I finally told her I practiced the craft and had actively done so since my early teen-age years, she drew even further away. When my kid brother started showing interest, she pretty much flipped and I haven't hear from her in a couple of years.
This was not a good experience, but I kind of expected it, as my mother has a lot of problems and is very self-focussed. I have not had a problem with most people who know me who know. Even a few of my friends who have no respect for anything pagan or occult as a general rule respect my beliefs. My best friend occasionally teases me about "me twirling a shaved rat widdershins around my head under the full moon", but he says it in fun and seems to have a lot of latent pagan tendancies.
To close, I am all for being out of the "broom closet" as it makes certain aspects of life easier, although some are made harder, I never like living what to *me* was a lie. And it got confusing remembering who knew the truth and when I needed to be careful not to let anything slip.
I hope being out brightens more of you life than it darkens.
Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2003 10:44 pm
Born a pagan to a pagan family in a pagan community. I have never been in a broom cupboard! At school, years ago when paganism was not so open, I would sometimes claim to be non-Christian or even atheist. That was somehow more acceptable to sensitive Christian teachers. At University, no one cared what I was (and still don't.)
Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2003 11:36 pm
Mythellin ... I also am from a similar background. My father brought me up in the ways of magick and has thus helped me to learn .. I have never had need for a broom closet!! It feels great not to have to do the whole - "Hello? Im outta the closet now .." sorta thing! I also had the same environment with school where it was more acceptable not to say that you were pagan or wicca at all!!
Anyhows - Blessed Be All!!
Posted: Fri Sep 05, 2003 2:45 pm
from the moment that Firelord started teaching me about Paganism because of my curiosity and i started chatting on this site, and i decided that this was the path for me, i have been very open about it from the very first moment to everyone EXCEPT to anyone in my family for they are strict Christians and would have a fit. But everyone else in the world can know that I am Wiccan and i don't care who knows.
I love my witchiness and my broom and they are not staying in the cloest! =D> heehee
Posted: Fri Sep 05, 2003 7:14 pm
I myself am currently half way in a few closets and they are quite friendly....most of you know about my sexuality and my path obviously...but i have to hide it all from my mother, so right now me and my closets are good friends...
Posted: Fri Sep 05, 2003 8:20 pm
Well Moonbaby, when you're ready to come out of your closets, you know that all of us here will be waiting with open arms to greet you!! *Big Huggz*
Posted: Fri Sep 05, 2003 8:45 pm
Mythelin, I knew your story, but it's nice to hear it agan.
Thanks everyone for your answers. I was just curious about everyone here, since you are my pagan family. My littlest sister knows, but no one else does in the family. I bet my mom might suspect, but she hasn't sked me, and I haven't told here. She was okay with my other sister being wicca, but I think she thought of it as another fad my sister went through, so that might change things, too. And my dad, well, we aren't that close about certain things and this is one of them. But, just as I wouldn't talk about sex with him, I don't really talk about religion, either.
So that is my family stuff, basically. My grandparents that live in town don't know. But they don't go to church and I'm not really sure that they believe in any religion. But I don't dare talk to my grandmother about it, because more than likely, I'll get some lecture about something on it, and I'll be dead before it's over. Or at least wish I were dead.
I guess that's it for now on this subject.
See what's new tomorrow, same bat time, same bat channel.
Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2003 9:09 am
I know I am late but...
<cat bats at lil butterflies with paw>
Sorry Seeker, I am a cat, but don't worry, I let them flutter away!
That is so wonderful about you and your daughter! Blessed are you indeed and congratulations!
I am out of the closet and have been for some time. Everyone at work knows that I am pagan, they kinda started asking questions when I smudged the place and brought crystals I for the machinery!
All of my friends and even some acquaintances know, I do not hide who I am. If someone has a problem with it then we don't need to be friends.
My parents know, dad is totally supportive of it, Mom was a little iffy at first but is OK now.
I haven't told any other family because some of them are Mormon (and other) and I already know what they will say... "Jen, your such a good person... I can't believe you don't believe in God, I can't believe that you worship the devil" sigh ... better left unsaid!
I too have problems with ignorant Christians, and some times tell them that I am a "nature lover" when asked only to dismiss being lectured...
I really only say that I am pagan when asked and take pride in it. Not to mention I have a few bumper stickers on my car that say such...
One is just the word "pagan", and one says "natural beauty ... see that's what you get when you raise your child a pagan!" And one says "God it too big to fit into just one religion!" that ones my favorite.
But I do live near Los Angeles soooooo there are so many different people here, I am not afraid of what others may think ... although someone did throw a rock at my car once while I was driving to work and yelled out profanity ... what a waste of energy!
The Cat who ate the Bat
Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2003 4:06 pm
they kinda started asking questions when I smudged the place and brought crystals I for the machinery!
I wish I felt free to express my beliefs with the rest of the world also
My fears are strictly 'financial' ones. My husband and I own our own business (mortgages) and I am very active in the community, things like the Chamber of Commerce, Women's Club, Rotary, etc. (organized grab-ass as my husband calls it); I truly believe that those of my generation are still too blinded by religious prejudices to do business with us if they knew I was a
Someday it may change, but for now, I LOVE to eat and the truth may literally interfere with that!
I cannot tell you how happy I am that my daughter has decided to start studying with my coven also. You cannot imagine what it has done to the bond between us. Perhaps that is the god/goddess's gift to me for having to keep it from everyone else.
P.S. Catch me if you can
here kitty, kitty, kitty
Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2003 8:09 pm
I'm sorry Seeker that yuo can't really tell any one. It is different for me. I have no need to tell anyone and everyone. Just the people I'm closest to, and then the ones who specifically ask. I'm not gonna lie to someone, as that I think goes against the rede. But simply not saying one way or the other if there are no questions is fine to me. All that really matters is what is in my heart. If I'm happy with things the way they are, then all is good.
But, I too believe that your daughter chosing to stufy with your coven is a gift. Take every advantage you have to make it work out. She may chose later that it isn't for her, but the time you spend together is very special.
Open minds and closed mouths...
Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2003 10:38 pm
For me I rarely discuss my true beliefs because it often times is too steep of a gradient for those who honestly think that this world and all its material trappings is all that there is. Some think of me as a Christian, some a buddhist, others a tarot reader. When someone asks me my faith, my answer generally varies to whom I am speaking with. This is not to be deceptive at all. Since I am a combination of many things for me to go with one particular "label" I feel that it would do the person whom I am speaking a grave injustice. Everyone has preconceived ideas of what certain faiths are, and oftentimes those don't really match what they truly are. When the word Wiccan or Pagan comes up, most think of clad-in-black pentagram wearers but few know the true faith behind it. Faiths are experiencial and not intellectual, meaning no matter how much you read up on a particular faith, you will not truly nor wholly know exactly what it is until you experience it yourself. Myself, I tend towards more occult studies than anything and to describe to someone a faith which is a combination of Christian, Gnostic, Buddhist, Hindu, Scientologist and Occultist would generally just brand me the label of "interesting but a weirdo". The few open minded talks in regards to my personal faith that I have had have been with pagan's, and one non-denominational friend. There was one occasion where I felt it necessary to go into greater depth, which was to a Mormon friend who was going to be a "temporary" roommate. Knowing that a simple glance at some of my literature would cause him to believe I worshipped Satan, I felt it necessary to let him know what my faith truly was. I wanted to give him the freedom of choice and the knowledge of my studies, so as not to offend or threaten his own faith, quite possibly putting him in spiritual harm. We ended up not being roommates for other reasons actually, his only warning to me being that he personally, from scripture, knows to "avoid even the appearance of evil." To describe to him that I intentionally study what some would consider "evil", I'm sure brought me deeper into his prayers. I don't mind, though, cause at times I'm sure I needed it. I take it as a compliment.
So generally speaking, I knew a while ago that I perceived things differently than most and oftentimes this path can be a solitary one. Most times, I am filled with a great sorrow for those who appear to be blind, simply choose not to see. But I am not a converter, nor a savior. I'm just a seeker of knowledge and only advertise myself as such to others like me.
Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2003 5:13 pm
white_harmony wrote:Well Moonbaby, when you're ready to come out of your closets, you know that all of us here will be waiting with open arms to greet you!! *Big Huggz*
aww thank you its always nice to get a hug...
Posted: Tue Sep 09, 2003 4:38 am
I kind of wish I had considered spending time in a closet. My father has an awful sense of humor and loves to ask things like "Hmmm, summer solstice...that's when they sacrifice the virgins, right? Should I be worried? If not, what haven't you been telling me......" or "Hey, how are your witches doing. Need any chickens or anything?" He's very good natured about it, but the jokes get old (he has short term memory problems that he milks.)
Moral of this story...it is hard living in the closet, but even those who accept won't necesarily understand.